This is a wonderful feeling, especially because for years my favorite place was kind of lame. I mean, I love it (it was my favorite place, after all), but it wasn't really an appropriate place to visit during savasana at the end of a great yoga class, or to picture during meditation, or to visualize to combat anxiety. That's because it wasn't a lake or the mountains or an endless verdant field...it was my parent's kitchen table in suburban New Jersey.
It's a very nice kitchen, open and bright, yet cozy. And it always houses people I love, great conversation, and many of my favorite foods. As places go, you can't beat it, but it's so un-sexy, and not really meditation-worthy (I visualize...my mom, the table, a banana with peanut butter, where's the magic?). So for years, I tried to change it. I remember lying in a green field at Kripalu, a yoga center in Massachusetts, blissed out on yoga and health food, the soft grass tickling my skin, staring at the sky and trying to imprint the moment in my mind: FOR ALL MEDITATION PURPOSES FORTHWITH, THIS SHALL NOW BE NAMED MY "FAVORITE PLACE." That didn't work.
I gazed across the sparkling water at my friend's family's lake house in Maine. The rich pinks and blues of summer dusk rose from the horizon as the water lapped rhythmically against the dock, the quiet pierced first by the cry of an early loon, and then by the perfect tiny explosions of cold beers being opened at just the right moment. I made my decision--THIS is what I will picture, this water, this sky--and backed it up with photos to take home as reminders. But the next time I needed to go to my place...thump, there I landed at that darn kitchen table.
I have spent years appreciating the beautiful green mountains of Vermont. I have gazed admiringly at the horizons of both the Atlantic and the Pacific Oceans. I have traveled Europe. I spent two glorious weeks traveling Italy on my honeymoon. I spent 2-1/2 months driving across the country in the front seat of a van, for god's sake. I have LOTS of gorgeous, natural, visualization-worthy images in my head, with wonderful memories attached to boot. Why was I stuck at this butcher block table in the middle of New Jersey every time I meditated?
Because being surrounded by my family--new members as well as old--is my favorite place to be. Gazing out at the wonders of nature is my second favorite place. And now my family has a new place to gather in the middle of some truly glorious nature. My favorite people, my favorite foods, my favorite conversations, my favorite place. My family.
May all who read this find comfort in their families as well, either the ones they came into the world with or the ones they have made and loved along the way.
Part Two coming soon.
10 comments:
Okay, I want to know whether you picture this new place now or go back to the kitchen table. There's just something visceral about the kitchen for so many people I know. And there's nothing wrong with that being your "happy" place.
Love.
My parents have been gone for years and the house gone for twenty...and I still think of that kitchen all the time. My sister sitting on the counter, eating toast at midnight, 1974. Holiday moments occupy my memory over more fantastic images since. You're so right, and how blessed you are to know it, to enjoy it, to offer it to your daughter. Wonderful.
Well said, Kimmy Pie! Other favorite places are just TFBS! I don't have any fond memories of my kitchen table, but lots of OTHER kitchen tables come to mind, and I know of what you speak!
Happy, happy!
So beautiful Kim!
Love your writing. I was right there with you, landing back down at the kitchen table.
Glad you found your place.
You are a lucky woman. You not only have been graced with this kitchen and its memories, you know their value.
Gratitude is a wonderful place to visit during savasana or any other quiet moment.
Love this post! Kitchens are such a great place of family, food, fellowship.
It's so nice to have your wonderful writing to read again. You have such a gift for pulling me through and into the places you describe.
Looking forward to Part Two.
Love.
Beautiful. I love that no matter what you tried to tell yourself about beauty and relaxation you always know exactly where to truly find comfort.
And that the people we love, no mater where they are gather, rank higher than every gorgeous place we've ever seen. Twice!
Thanks for taking me into your kitchen (and back into my own!)Wonderful writing.
I ADORE this post. I have exactly the same "problem" as you. My favorite places aren't visualization-worthy either. You really touched a cord. Now, where is this new and wonderful place?
Lovely, Kim, bright and clear and honest. Thank you! xo tg
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